I recently had the experience of planning an entire weekend of dates with someone coming in from out of town. It was my first time of planning dates with someone I barely knew. I normally do not rob men of this role as it is what they do best, but this was a special situation. I am glad I had this opportunity as it really gave me much needed insight into what men must think and feel when planning dates.
From my perspective it can be brutal! Think about it, you are planning a date with someone you just met and you do not know anything about what they like or do not like. What if they hate a certain kind of food? What if their idea of fun is NOT what you plan? What if they are allergic to something and you pick that type of food? Men I have a new found respect for you!
I cheated somewhat or at least took the easy way out by mainly choosing my favorite places to eat and some of my favorite activities to do. I would not suggest you embrace that as fully as I did, but maybe use it as a fall back. I did incorporate in a couple of new places or activities. I also know normally you are planning one date at a time, not three for an entire weekend.
In general, women prefer to talk and be listened to and men prefer action and risk. Both always rate laughing as a must! Your date will be most successful if you can accomplish combining all three - talking, action and laughter! It is said that if you can do something that creates fear, excitement or adrenaline then you bond more and faster. I do not mean that you are to scare your date, but something that has a risk or danger factor can increase your connection.
What you can ask yourself when planning a date is, “if a stranger came to my town, what is the number one place I would recommend them to eat? and what is the one thing they had to do or see if they only had time for one activity?” This would be a great date.
These are all mainly dates for the “getting to know each other” stage of dating. I do not recommend movies, concerts, or any places where you would not be able to comfortably talk for initial dates. I do, however, recommend something that will make you stand out above the rest!
After experiencing this from the other side of the fence I wanted to put together a list of as many date ideas I could for all those marvelous men out there who take on this challenging part of dating! I have combined my list of date ideas with several others from on line or books I have read.
These are in no particular order, but I tried to categorize them:
FUN AND UNUSUAL:
Candy store or factory
Music store
Pet store
Photo shoot – buy 2 disposable cameras and go somewhere like a train yard, flower farm, zoo or another funky place and shoot pictures. Plan a time to get back together to go over the pictures. (Men you take the cameras and develop them. Unless you don’t want a 2nd date, let her take the camera she used and develop the pictures herself.) (from The Dirt on Dating by Hayley DiMarco)
Scavenger hunt – have her go on a scavenger hunt. Give her a note that tells here where she needs to go first. Make it a fun place that she might like – like give her $20 in an envelope and tell her to go to a certain store and buy herself something small. Or send her to the flower shop to pick up some flowers that you have already paid for. When she gets to the first place have another note there for her that will lead her to another place. Give her about four places to go before she gets where you are. (from The Dirt on Dating by Hayley DiMarco)
Explore – go somewhere neither of you have gone before. (from The Dirt on Dating by Hayley DiMarco)
Teach – Teach your date something that you do really well. (from The Dirt on Dating by Hayley DiMarco)
Taste testing – pick one kind of food or drink that she loves, like a drink or dessert then go to four different restaurants and judge each one based on the quality and taste. Talk about the food you choose to judge, the special tastes, the way it’s served, the service. Make a night of being a food critic. (from The Dirt on Dating by Hayley DiMarco)
Q&A – get a book of questions and spend the evening over dinner asking each other weird stuff that you would never have thought of. (from The Dirt on Dating by Hayley DiMarco)
Theme Date – Find out what your date likes and build around that. If she loves Italy, make it an Italian night. Bring her Italian chocolate, take her to an Italian restaurant, buy an Italian CD to play in the car, and then rent an Italian movie with subtitles. (from The Dirt on Dating by Hayley DiMarco)
Vacation at Home (Staycation) – Never been a tourist in your own town? Well, give it a try. Go to the local visitor’s bureau or chamber of commerce and ask about touristy things to do in your area. The staff there can help you come up with all kinds of fun things to do. You can even decide to take a camera around with you and ask people to take pictures of you guys. Girls love memory-makers like photos. (from The Dirt on Dating by Hayley DiMarco)
Old folks home – talk to old people, find out about their pasts, help them out. (from The Dirt on Dating by Hayley DiMarco)
Go around the city with sidewalk chalk and draw hearts with equations inside on random things.
(from http://everythingrandom.net/post/62493241/unusual-and-fun-date-ideas)
Walk around a city and perform short silent plays in front of security cameras.(from http://everythingrandom.net/post/62493241/unusual-and-fun-date-ideas)
With camera and pair of boots, make photo log of a day in the life of the invisible man. (from http://everythingrandom.net/post/62493241/unusual-and-fun-date-ideas)
Write a piece of fiction together. Outside at a cafe. Ask strangers when you get stuck. (from http://everythingrandom.net/post/62493241/unusual-and-fun-date-ideas)
Create photo evidence suggesting that you went on an adventure that didn’t really happen. (from http://everythingrandom.net/post/62493241/unusual-and-fun-date-ideas)
Go on a search for as many good climbing trees as possible, climb as high as you both can in all of them, compile photo evidence.
(from http://everythingrandom.net/post/62493241/unusual-and-fun-date-ideas)
Go to a major chain bookstore, and leave notes to future readers in copies of your favorite books.
(from http://everythingrandom.net/post/62493241/unusual-and-fun-date-ideas)
Dress up as superheroes and stop at least one petty crime “ie. jaywalking, littering….” (from http://everythingrandom.net/post/62493241/unusual-and-fun-date-ideas)
Go to the airport, get the cheapest, soonest departing flight to anywhere when you show up, and stay there for a weekend.
(from http://everythingrandom.net/post/62493241/unusual-and-fun-date-ideas)
Dress to the nines, pretend to be married, and test drive very expensive vehicles at an auto dealership.
(from http://everythingrandom.net/post/62493241/unusual-and-fun-date-ideas)
Do the lamest tourist thing in your area that you have both secretly wanted to do forever. Have an unabashed good time!.
(from http://everythingrandom.net/post/62493241/unusual-and-fun-date-ideas)
In the middle of the night, drive to the beach, so you arrive just as the sun is rising. Have a breakfast picnic, then fall asleep together. Bring a sun umbrella. (from http://everythingrandom.net/post/62493241/unusual-and-fun-date-ideas)
Go to a minor league baseball game under the stars. Tell each other stories about how bad you are at athletics. Randomly cheer for both teams. Eat lots of Cracker Jacks. (from http://everythingrandom.net/post/62493241/unusual-and-fun-date-ideas)
Walk around a city and perform short silent plays in front of security cameras. (from http://everythingrandom.net/post/62493241/unusual-and-fun-date-ideas)
Walk around the city all night and find a place to eat breakfast at dawn. (from http://everythingrandom.net/post/62493241/unusual-and-fun-date-ideas)
Rent a movie you’ve never seen before. Set on mute and improvise dialogue. (from http://everythingrandom.net/post/62493241/unusual-and-fun-date-ideas)
DIFFERENT DINNER IDEAS:
Dinner cruise – where available
Progressive dinner – each part of meal is done at a different restaurant
Go to a restaurant and convince the cook to create something completely new for you. (from http://everythingrandom.net/post/62493241/unusual-and-fun-date-ideas)
Drive somewhere unknown and have dinner in a city you’ve never been to. With fake names.
(from http://everythingrandom.net/post/62493241/unusual-and-fun-date-ideas)
Backwards dinner – Have dinner backwards. Start with dessert and work your way back. (from The Dirt on Dating by Hayley DiMarco)
ACTIVE (from less adrenaline to more):
Zoo
Circus
Picnic in the park
Horseshoes, badminton, frisbee golf, croquet, bocce ball, washers pitching game, ladder ball
Miniature golf or real golf or indoor golf simulation place
Horseback riding
Bicycle ride
Bowling
Indoor batting cages
Driving range
Tennis
Roller skating
Paddle boating
Laser tag
Ice Skating
Racquetball
Hiking
Rock or wall climbing
Sledding, snowboarding or skiing
Target shooting
Haunted house or forest
Zip line, repelling, sky coaster, or bungee jumping
Amusement park
Paint ball
CLASSES:
Cooking class
Wine tasting class
Massage classes
Dance class
SPECTATOR:
Comedy Club
Melodrama
Museum or art gallery
College or professional basketball/football/hockey/soccer/baseball game
SPECTATOR WITH A LITTLE MORE RISK FACTOR:
Roller Derby
Nascar or other drag racing
Motor cross
Rodeo
Tough man contest
Boxing
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I hope that all of you who read this will add a few ideas of your own! Fellow daters help each other out! Every time I hear another good idea I will add it to this blog.
Until next time…..
Happy Dating,
Ronda Welsh, Your Dating Strategist
Helping singles remove the doubt from dating.
www.resolveittogether.com
ronda@resolveittogether.com
http://daterightnow.blogspot.com/
316-409-4431
P.S.
I also know a man who planned a very special birthday for his wife which I thought was the best EVER! He rented a limo. He had it pick her up and take her to different places that were very special locations with meaning to her life. At each stop there was a person they would pick up in the limo with a note about how she had met this person at this locale or about a special time they had at that place. For example they went to her high school and picked up her best friend, and then they went to the hospital where her daughter was born and picked up her daughter. I think they even went to the place where he and her met and picked him up…maybe that was the first stop. Anyway you get the gist….this is an idea for later in the relationship.
